I just had a sudden burst of missing you come over me. Full on tears rolling down my face hands clenched miss you. There’s a girl on say yes to the dress that lost her love in war… She found someone new and was getting married.. after she decided on the dress she broke down in it. I know what was going through her head. It goes through mine every time I get close to someone who isn’t you.
Fuck I miss you.

via dolliecrave

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It’s days like these I wish eating disorders didn’t exist. So not proud..

Two years tomorrow you took part of me away from myself .

Two years tomorrow you made me put my family second and hurt them beyond belief.

Two years tomorrow I really started to fall.

Two years tomorrow my mother started crying at my changes.

Two years later I’m still recovering . But my family is first and I’m figuring out who I am. Two years later I’m starting to really love myself for once.

Guess what Chris ? I fucked up again, are you surprised? I’m so sick of not having you here. I’m sick of remembering that you’re dead and you’re never coming back. I’m sick of feeling so scared of the future and sick of fucking things up. I want to be better, I want to smile and not feel like screaming my lungs out. I want to pick up the phone and call you and have you tell me its okay, its all okay . Why did you have to die? Why did they take the only real support I had around here away . It’s been almost two years since brandon and I. Everytime I look at the scars I feel the pain all over again. Everytime I look in the mirror I hear his voice in my head. Make it stop